There are many ways to go off the path during our Journey.  Our Ego's are very clever and can create deceptions and illusions that make us feel like our current reality is the right one and that we are taking the best step(s).  We will need our Practices and a healthy dose of Discernment to be able to see through these illusions.  The Detours come in many forms, which are mostly referred to here as Spiritual Detours, such as Spiritual Materialism, Spiritual Bypassing and Spiritual Cul-de-Sac.  Spiritual Materialism is pretty much as it sounds, it is an illusion of collecting souvenirs along our journey that give us a false sense of have achieved goals and that we are making great progress.  Spiritual Bypassing is the illusion that we can take short-cuts to allow us to achieve more goals in a shorter time, or to assume that we have already made achievements or even think that we have arrived.  One of my favourites is the Spiritual Cul-de-Dac, or as I like to call it, The Rollercoaster.  The Rollercoaster happens as we go along our journey and decide that we like the look of something and fancy a quick ride.  Just a bit of fun perhaps but what comes next is an illusion.  We are enjoying the ride so much that when it comes around to the start again we convince ourselves that actually the ride isn't over, there is more work to do and more steps to take!  We then get so used to this feeling that we believe that we are on a good journey and taking many good steps.  Unfortunately the reality is that we are stuck, pedal to the metal and going around in circles achieving very little except for fun! Hopefully our Practices will allows to break through these illusions and get back on the real path of taking the next real step(s). It won't be easy our Ego will resist greatly, it will not like changing its reality.

The ultimate kind of Detour is Narcissism, which is: A pervasive pattern of grandiosity, whether in fantasy or behaviours, a deep need for admiration, and a perceived lack of empathy (actually a lack of caring), exhibited in early adulthood and presented in a variety of contexts.

Some traits might appear as follows:

• Perceived lack of empathy: although often described as a lack of empathy, the reality is that they know how others feel but are unwilling to recognise, care for or identify with the feelings and needs of others.
• Grandiose sense of self-importance: exaggerates achievements, knowledge and capabilities and expects to be recognised as superior without evidential validation.
• Sense of entitlement: unreasonable expectations of treatment by others and/or expected compliance with their expectations in entirety, giving no quarter.
• Exploitative: takes advantage of others to achieve their own goals.
• Envious nature: an inflated sense of being envied by others but in reality, envious of others to the point of hate and resentment.
• Requires excessive admiration: will seek/demand that others pay compliments and recognise any and every perceived achievement, no matter how small or fantastical.
• Center of the Universe: believes that nothing earthly really "touches" them, that they are "special", unique and can only be understood by and associated with other special or high-status entities.
• Preoccupied with fantasies: of unlimited professional/personal/financial success, power, brilliance and perfect love.

Whilst we can all experience Detours, we can also have Narcissistic tendencies depending on how much fear, shame and guilt that is causing us pain. Some might remain with their fear, shame and guilt and keep their pain. Some might tend towards allowing others to subjugate (control) them and increase their pain. Some tend to have a desperate need to free themselves of their pain and start to exhibit the traits of the Narcissist and thus, it is possible to lift the pain (temporarily) by making others feel more fear, shame and guilt. This is especially easy if the other person is willing to be subjugated (controlled).

In the Karpman drama triangle, the Narcissist will tell you they are the victim and you are the Persecutor but the reality is that the Narcissist is the Persecutor, you are the victim, and somehow, you feel like the rescuer! You really feel like you are doing good but you are being told its all your fault and the reality is that you are being abused. Get your head round that one! Think of a Narcissist as an extremely selfish tyrant, skilled at using the traits above to manipulate others to make themselves feel better at any cost. As you can imagine, should you find one, the most common advice is to run!.